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King Star King vs Deadpool
Description Adult Swim vs Marvel! Which of these regenerating, perverted lunatics will come out on top? Interlude Wiz: Being unable to die definitely has its advantages. But in some cases, it also has its drawbacks... Boomstick: like turning you batshit insane! Wiz: And few show it better than Deadpool, the merc with the mouth. Boomstick: And King Star King, hero of the Gigantiverse. Wiz: It's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle! Deadpool Boomstick: Oh look. Another fight with Deadpool in it. Let's run this cycle again, I guess... Wiz: Let's just get this bio over with and move on. Boomstick: Oh alright. Wiz: Wade Wilson was a skilled mercenary with a happy life. He had everything he could have wanted. Boomstick: Money, respect, a girl as crazy as he was. The necessities in life. Wiz: That is until the day he was diagnosed with cancer. And his life started caving in around him. Boomstick: Mostly of his own choice. He left everything behind. Of course, that part kinda saved his life, in the long run. Wiz: That's right! Wade's decisions eventually led him into the "care" of the Weapon X program. Boomstick: That's when Mr. Wilson was experimented on and tortured until he developed his powers. And then... y'know... used them to escape. Wiz: Following his escape from confinement, this new mutate continued his life as a mercenary. Albeit a little more... Boomstick: Crazy. A LOT more crazy. Wiz: Right. Under his new name, Deadpool, Wade enacted his justice in his own way. Boomstick: Which includes lots of violent insanity. Wiz: Made easier by a superhuman physique and powerful healing factor. Deadpool can regenerate from just about anything. Able to survive being diced to bits, pounded into paste, shredded to ribbons, blown apart, and so on. Boomstick: yep. He's damn near impossible to kill. Even moreso after he was cursed by Thanos to literally be incapable of dying. Wiz: Yeah... but Wade's got more than just his mutant abilities to him. He's also got one huge arsenal. Boomstick: Pistols, machine guns, grenade launchers, plasma rifles, grenades, flashbangs, bear traps, katanas, hammers, sai... the list goes on and on. Wiz: Deadpool is an expert marksman and combatant. More than capable of taking down opponents far more powerful than himself. Boomstick: he can even take out other regenerators with his carbonatium sword. Which he took from the body of... himself from another dimension. Wiz: yeah. No matter which way you slice it, this mercenary has more than earned his infamy among the Marvel Universe. Deadpool: Alright. We're done here. Roll credits! King Star King Wiz: Trillions of years before the big bang, there was the Gigantiverse. Within it was the Heavenly Realm. Boomstick: And within that was a pile of pure insanity. As well as a tall, musclebound man by the name of King Star King. Wiz: King Star King was an inhabitant of the Heavenly Realm, as was his girlfriend, Snow White. Who was... the daughter... of God. Boomstick: Wait... what the f***?!? Wiz: I know. Dont think about it too much. Boomstick: Well, he definitely found quite the girl. Famous dad, huge rack, royalty... Wiz: And an overprotective father. Who is also literally God. Boomstick: Well, I certainly wouldn't want to have my memories erased and be banished to a place called the "Crotch Zone" Wiz: After his banishment, King Star King got a job as the cook at a waffle restaurant. Boomstick: Until he was like... immediately found by Snow and got his memories back. Wiz: And then Snow got kidnapped by the Spring Bunny, a maniacal rabbit who can lay exploding easter eggs. Boomstick: Does this ever start to make sense? Wiz: Not really. Boomstick: Of course... well, at least he got the girl back, only to lose her again. Wiz: And so began the journey of the hero, King Star King. Boomstick: I'd hardly call this guy a hero. He's more like an idiot with powers who just happens to be doing something semi-good for his own benefit. Wiz: Speaking of powers, King Star King has a healing factor, superhuman strength, and the ability to cause lightning to strike. Boomstick: But he never really uses that lightning for anything more than to add flair to whatever he's doing. Wiz: And he can even boost his powers. How so, you ask? Boomstick: Why, by doing drugs, of course! Wiz: Yep. King Star King gains accelerated regeneration and boosted strength when he's under the effects of drugs. Boomstick: And even when he's not giving himself a boost, he can also call for backup by summoning his friends to aid him. Wiz: Hank Waffles was his manager, before the restaurant was destroyed. To save his life, his soul was transferred into the body of the restaurant mascot. Since then, he has begrudgingly accompanied King Star King on his journey. Boomstick: Gurbles is a flying... something that can travel through space at warp speeds. It also has massive, sharp teeth that it can use to devour opponents. Wiz: And last but not least, Pooza is a wizard duck whom King Star King can throw as a massively strong projectile. And he can even manipulate souls and cast powerful spells. Boomstick: all while looking like something straight out of my childhood nightmares. *shudders* Wiz: These adventurers have accomplished some crazy things. Boomstick: Like one-shotting Death, for one. Wiz: And defeating massively strong beings. Such as a gigantic robot with the power to kill God. Boomstick: By plowing Snow White so hard that the robot's head exploded! Hot damn! Wiz: He even survived a direct attack from God right afterwards. Boomstick: What the actual hell? Does this guy even have any flaws? Wiz: Oh, he has plenty. For one, his body is actually no more durable than a human's, making him easy to tear apart. Although he can always just regenerate. Boomstick: Also he's not the sharpest tool in the shed, easily fooled or distracted by the simplest things Wiz: And while his brain can regenerate, he can't function without it, leaving him unable to fight until his brain rebuilds itself. Boomstick: why? It's not like he's using it anyway. KSK: Unhand Snow White, Spring Bunny! For I am King Star Ki- *shot* Boomstick: Ha! Dumbass! Intermission Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time... FOR A DEATH BATTLE!!! Death Battle In the middle of a desolate wasteland, a massive, grotesque beast is holding Snow White, princess of the Heavenly Realm, hostage. The creature looms over to devour her, only for its head to be sliced clean off by a red-clothed figure wielding a katana. The creature's grip releases the princess and she manages to crawl free. Snow White: My hero, you... wait... who are you? The figure doesn't respond. Instead, he walks toward her, staring at her chest. He puts his arm around her. Deadpool: Me? You can call me Mr. Wilson, babe Just then, a crack of thunder rings out as lightning strikes the ground, and a muscular, long-haired man in a jean-jacket appears where the lightning hit ground. KSK: Worry not, Snow White! I am here to... He notices the mercenary with his arm around her, and his expression quickly changes to rage. KSK: Hey! Hands of my girl, scrawny! Deadpool: who's this chump? Your boyfriend? He shrugs off the enraged adventurer's presence and turns back toward Snow. Deadpool: You could do way better than some edgy He-Man wannabe. King Star King roars in anger as he charges at the two, swinging a punch at Deadpool, who simply teleports away. KSK: You're dead, wimp! DEAD! Deadpool: Man, you need to relax... He pulls out his katanas Deadpool: Might I recommend... acupuncture? Fight! King Star King charges once more, swinging a punch, which Deadpool ducks under. The red-clothed mercenary does a backflip, kicking the space adventurer in the chin. He follows by slicing King Star King across the chest with his katana, spurting blood everywhere. The hero of the Gigantiverse stumbles backwards, gripping the massive slice wound across his chest. KSK: Ha! You think that's enough? I am King Star King, hero of the Heavenly Realm! The wound from the katana begins closing, and Deadpool quickly rushes him. Deadpool: Then I'll just hit you some more! King Star King backsteps Deadpool's attack, and grabs the mercenary by the throat, gripping him tight enough to easily crush the vertebrae in his neck. KSK: Not gonna happen, chump. Deadpool (in a raspy, choked voice): Y'know, I wouldn't recommend crushing on me... King Star King is caught off-guard that his opponent is still talking, and he loses focus, just long enough for Deadpool to jam his katana into King Star King's chest. His grip loosens as the mercenary's sword is rammed into him. Deadpool: I'll just break your heart. King Star King falls to his knee, but slowly staggers to his feet. KSK: My heart... belongs... to my bride! He uppercuts Wade, sending him sprawling onto the ground with a busted jaw. Wade stands back up, and pulls out his twin pistols. King Star King summons Gurbles, and rides at Deadpool, avoiding the merc's gunfire. They reach him and Gurbles pounces on Deadpool, sinking its fangs into him. Deadpool: Whoah! Down, boy! He jams a sai in Gurbles's eyes, blinding it. The creature recoils back, roaring in pain. Deadpool then kicks it in the face, knocking it away. King Star King, enraged, tears apart his jean-jacket, lightning strikes in the background. Deadpool: Ooh! Are we taking our clothes off now? Deadpool starts removing his shirt, only to receive a kick to the gut that launches him back. KSK: Enough games! Time to die! Deadpool: aww, but I love games! In fact, here's one right now! He throws a grenade at King Star King, yelling "Hot Potato!". King Star King catches it and throws it back. Deadpool, in return, grabs it in midair and teleports with it, appearing right in front of the adventurer and jamming it in his mouth. Deadpool: Mashed potato! The grenade explodes, blowing both of them to bits. Everything goes black. Then, the view shows eyes slowly fluttering open. This is shown to be the view of King Star King, his body half-rebuilt. Deadpool laying next to him, fully formed and tauntingly rubbing his shoulder. Deadpool: Oh, last night was magical, my love~. ''' He pulls out his carbonatium sword. '''Deadpool: Let's go another round. But I only have time for a quickie. He swings it, only for his hand to be stopped by Hank Waffles. Deadpool plays tug-of-war with him over the sword. Deadpool: oh, a threesome? Sounds like fun! King Star King, in the confusion, pulls out a joint and takes a puff of it, body putting itself back together almost instantly. He turns and grabs the sword, prying it away from both of them and throwing it into the distance, his strength massively increased. KSK: Alright. But no toys. He punches Deadpool, his fist going the whole way through Wade's torso. Deadpool: I've always been a fan of the *cough* penetration as well. Hank Waffles: You two are both lunatics. I'm out of here. Hank walks away while King Star King rips his arm out of Deadpool and tosses him aside. As Deadpool stands, he is struck by a magical blast from Pooza, the wizard. Pooza: It's over now, red man! Nyahahahaha! Pooza begins firing magic wildly, causing Deadpool to have to dodge like crazy while making his approach. Deadpool kicks the wizard in the head, knocking him into King Star King. The adventurer retaliates by squishing Pooza into a ball and launching him at Wade, sending him soaring into the distance. KSK: Bon Voyage! Wilson lands, his body smashed, next to a sword wedged in a large boulder. He drags himself up, and staggers over to the sword. Meanwhile, in the distance, Pooza and King Star King go to greet the princess, sure that their adversary could not possibly have survived. Pooza: That red man was a joke, King Star King! He stood no chance against us! Deadpool slowly pulls the sword from the stone, humming dramatic music as he holds it skyward, the sunlight glinting off the blade. KSK: Yes, Pooza. I should have called for you sooner. Pooza: of course, King Star Ki-'' Pooza was silenced mid-sentence. King Star King looked back to see Deadpool holding the sorcerer's head, still dripping with blood. '''Deadpool: he should have ducked.' Deadpool throws the wizard's head at King Star King, who catches it. He looks down at his friend's head, then looks back up in rage. He lays the head down, and charges at Deadpool, but he simply dodges away. He continues dodging the hero's swings, backing away from him continuously. KSK: WHY! Deadpool keeps dodging, flipping and teleporting as the adventurer wildly swings at him. KSK: WON'T! Wade notices that they are approaching a cliff, and gives King Star King a kick to the head to further anger him. KSK: YOU! The hero of the Gigantiverse winds back one final swing at his full strength, throwing it forward with all his might. KSK: DIE!!!! He is thrown off-balance as his final swing is avoided by Deadpool teleporting behind him. He stumbles at the cliff edge. Below him is a deep canyon. He is about to turn around when he is impaled through the midsection with the sword. He gasps in pain, feeling his body failing to regenerate even now. KSK: W-what? Deadpool kicks him off the sword. King Star King grabs the ledge, barely stopping himself from falling into the ravine. He looks down, and desperately looks up at Deadpool. KSK: L-look, you already won... just... He reaches up to Deadpool. KSK: Help me... and we can forget about this. Deadpool chuckles, and reaches down, grabbing his hand and pulling him only partway up. He holds his sword to King Star King's throat as the hero tries all he can to escape, to no avail. He had lost too much blood already to resist. Deadpool: Long live the King In one stroke, Deadpool slices the hero's head clean off, and drops his body into the ravine. KO Deadpool is seen finding Snow White in hiding, while King Star King's body lands on Hank Waffles and smashes him. Results Boomstick: well, that... happened. Wiz: While both characters had healing factors, as well as the ability to kill another regenerating entity (Deadpool's carbonatium sword and Pooza's soul manipulation), Pooza would be unable to kill Deadpool due to his curse from Thanos. Boomstick: Not to mention that King Star King's low intelligence and far more limited experience led him to hold little to no strategic advantage. Along with being far slower. Wiz: And once his teammates were out of the picture, King Star King stood little chance one-on-one with Deadpool. Boomstick: in the end, King Star King just im-paled in comparison. Wiz: *sigh*... the winner is Deadpool. Who do you think would win? Deadpool King Star King Category:What-If? Death Battles Category:Completed What-If? Death Battles Category:'Toon Force' themed Death Battles Category:"Male vs Male" Themed Death Battles Category:What-If? Death Battles completed in 2016